HOW TO TURN 40 IN 20 STEPS

STEP 1:  Get yourself some good friends.  

They just might throw you a party you'll never forget.

STEP 2:  Eat cake.

STEP 3:  Make a wish.
Preferably on stage with a microphone.

STEP 4:  Bang head.

STEP 5:  Continue banging head.

STEP 6:  Repeat as needed.

STEP 7:  Embrace friends.

STEP 8:  Embrace friends while banging head.

STEP 9:  Make new friends.

STEP 10:  Honor ancestry.

STEP 11:  Eat cupcakes while avoiding suckerpunch.

STEP 12:  Think globally, act locally.

STEP 13:  Get yourself a really good DJ.
Try to keep drunks away while he's working.

STEP 14:  Get outdoors and celebrate multiculturalism.

STEP 15:  Try a new athletic activity with family.

STEP 16:  Defy gravity and your digestive system.
We suggest the Screamin' Eagle.

STEP 17:  Climb a mountain during a solar eclipse with loved ones.

STEP 18:  Review your choices.

STEP 19:  Eat more cupcakes.

STEP 20:  Shamelessly throw yourself a second or third party and repeat until Iron Maiden comes to your town.